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His heartbeat is in my chest.
Not metaphor. Not some romance novel bullshit. I can feel it. Steady. Strong. Right under my ribs where mine should be the only one.
I open my eyes and he's still here. Cain. Alpha Cain Locke, who threw me past the border three years ago and told me if I came back he'd kill me himself. He's sitting against the wall of my shitty studio apartment, watching me like I'm a bomb that might go off again.
Maybe I am.
"Get out," I say. My voice comes out rough. Everything hurts. Shifting always hurts but last night was worse. I remember fire. I remember his voice cutting through the red haze. Down. One word and my wolf just—dropped.
"Can't," he says.
I push myself up. I'm on my bed. Still dressed, thank god. Jeans and a tank top that's seen better days. There's dirt under my nails. Blood too, but I don't think it's mine.
"Wasn't a question. Get. Out."
He doesn't move. Just looks at me with those cold gray eyes that used to make me want to prove myself and now just make me want to punch him.
"You feel it," he says.
I do. God, I do. His heartbeat. It's like someone stuck a second pulse inside me and I can't claw it out.
"I don't feel anything."
"Lila."
"Don't." I swing my legs off the bed. My apartment is maybe three hundred square feet. Bed, kitchenette, bathroom the size of a closet. He takes up too much space just sitting there. "You don't get to say my name. You don't get to be here. You made your choice."
"I made the choice that kept you alive."
I laugh. It tastes bitter. "You threw me to the humans. You know what they do to us when they find out?"
"You're still breathing."
"Barely." I'm on my feet now. Everything's spinning but I don't let it show. "I've been choking down the wolf for three years. Working graveyard shifts so I don't have to see people. Swallowing enough sedatives to drop a horse every full moon. And last night I still—" I stop. My hands are shaking. "What did I do?"
He stands. Slow. Like I'm the dangerous one here. "You shifted. Halfway. Your wolf was trying to burn through and you weren't strong enough to hold her."
"How much damage?"
"Warehouse district. Empty lot. No casualties."
No casualties. I breathe out. That's something.
"And then you showed up," I say. "How? I'm three hours outside Duskridge territory. How did you even know?"
He's quiet for a second too long.
"You've been watching me," I say. "This whole time. You've been—"
"Making sure you didn't expose us. Yes."
The anger comes up so fast I'm across the room before I decide to move. I shove him. He doesn't budge. Might as well shove a wall.
"You knew," I say. "You knew I was struggling and you just watched."
"You were exiled. I couldn't—"
"Couldn't what? Couldn't help? Couldn't give a shit?" I shove him again. My hands hit his chest and that's when I feel it. His heartbeat. Not just inside me. Under my palms. They're syncing. Mine. His. Beating together.
I jerk back like he burned me.
"What did you do to me?"
"Alpha command," he says. His voice is too calm. Too controlled. "I used it to stop your shift. But you weren't pack anymore. The command shouldn't have worked. When I forced it—"
"You broke something."
"I created something." He takes a step closer. I take one back. "A bond. Temporary. It'll fade."
"Liar."
His jaw tightens. That's how I know I'm right.
"How long?" I ask.
"I don't know."
"Guess."
"Weeks. Maybe months."
"Months." I want to scream. I want to shift and tear this whole building down. "I can feel your heartbeat. Can you feel mine?"
He nods.
"Can you feel anything else?"
"Anger," he says. "Fear. Yours. Not mine."
I'm gonna be sick. I turn away. Press my hands against the kitchen counter. It's cheap laminate. Peeling at the edges. I've been staring at it for three years thinking at least it's mine. At least I'm alone.
Not anymore.
"There's more," he says behind me.
Of course there is.
"The northern packs are moving in," he says. "Blackriver. Ironclaw. They're coordinating. They want Duskridge territory and they're going to take it unless I can prove we're strong enough to hold it."
"Not my problem."
"You're crimson blood, Lila. Your wolf—"
"My wolf got me exiled."
"Your wolf is the only thing that can tip the balance." He's closer now. I can feel him behind me. Not just the heartbeat. His presence. His warmth. I hate it. "One year. That's all I need. You come back. You stand with the pack. We show strength. After that you're free. The bond will fade. You can go wherever you want."
I turn around. He's right there. Too close.
"Why would I help you?"
"Because the alternative is they find you here. Alone. And they will find you, Lila. Last night lit you up like a flare. Every pack within two hundred miles felt that surge. They're already looking."
My stomach drops.
"And if I say no?"
"Then you run. Again. And you keep running until something faster catches you."
I want to hit him. I want to ask him why he didn't just let me burn three years ago. It would've been easier.
"One year," I say.
"One year."
"And then I'm free. No bond. No pack. No you."
"You have my word."
I laugh. "Your word. Right. That worked out great last time."
Something flickers across his face. Might be guilt. Might be nothing.
"I'm not the one who framed you," he says quietly.
My breath catches. "But you know who did."
He doesn't answer. That's answer enough.
I grab his shirt. Pull him down so we're eye to eye. He tenses but he doesn't stop me.
"You knew what I was," I say. My voice shakes. "You knew I couldn't control it. You still sent me away."
"I had no choice."
"There's always a choice."
"Not when the pack—"
The window explodes.
Glass everywhere. I'm on the ground before I process it. Cain's over me, shielding me, and I feel his heartbeat spike inside my chest.
Something silver is stuck in the wall. Bolt. Crossbow bolt.
Cain moves first. He crosses the room and yanks it out. There's paper wrapped around the shaft. He unrolls it.
I see his face change.
"What?" I push myself up. Glass crunches under my hands. "What is it?"
He turns the paper around.
Two words. Block letters. RED WOLF.
My blood goes cold.
"They know," I whisper.
Cain's eyes meet mine. For the first time since he walked into my apartment, he looks worried.
"They know," he says.