Chapter 32 · Play It Back

Cole stood in the snow outside the safehouse. His breath came out white and hard. He could hear Ivy inside, still at the laptop, probably reading through more of his failures.

He didn't go back in.

The video kept playing in his head. His own face. His own hand on the trigger. Nail on his knees. Marcus. The guy who'd pulled him out of more firefights than Cole could count. The guy who called him brother.

And Cole had put a round through his skull.

He didn't remember it. That was the worst part. He didn't remember pulling that trigger, didn't remember what loop that was, didn't remember why. Just gone. Erased. Like it never happened.

Except it did.

His fingers were numb. He realized he'd been standing out here long enough that the cold had crept through his jacket. He flexed his hands. Still worked. Still his.

For now.

The door opened behind him. Ivy.

"You saw it," she said. Not a question.

"Enough."

"Cole—"

"Don't." He didn't turn around. "I know what you're going to say."

"You don't."

"You're gonna tell me it wasn't my fault. That I was probably compromised.