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His hand's still on my throat.
Not tight enough to kill. Just tight enough so I know he could.
"You're coming with me," Gu Hanchuan says. His voice is flat, like he's ordering dinner. "Tonight."
I don't move. Can't, really—my legs are still shaking from what Uncle did, and the bleeding hasn't stopped. I can feel it soaking through the back of my robe, warm and sticky. The room smells like iron and incense and something else. Something sharp. His fire poison, maybe. It's rolling off him in waves.
"I said no."
His fingers tighten. Just a fraction. "You don't get to say no."
"Then kill me." I meet his eyes. They're dark. Too dark. Like someone dumped ink in water and it hasn't settled yet. "You walked past me once. Do it again."
For a second I think he might actually do it. His jaw clenches. His hand shakes—not from hesitation, from the poison. I can see the veins in his neck turning black, crawling up toward his face like roots looking for something to choke.
Then he lets go.
I drop. My knees hit the floor and it hurts like hell but I don't make a sound. I learned a long time ago that sounds just make it worse.
Gu Hanchuan steps back. He's breathing hard. Sweat's dripping down his temple even though it's cold in here. The poison's getting worse. Good.
"You think I want this?" He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. There's blood on it. His, not mine. "You think I came here because I like looking at you?"
"I think you came here because you're dying."
He laughs. It's ugly. "Yeah. I am."
Behind him, Uncle's still on the floor. He's breathing, but barely. Gu Hanchuan hit him so hard I heard something crack. Part of me wants to crawl over there and check if he's really out. The other part wants to kick him until he stops breathing altogether.
I stay put.
"Three years," I say quietly. "You've had this poison for three years."
"Yeah."
"And now you need me."
"Yeah."
"Funny how that works."
His eyes snap to mine. For a moment I think I pushed too far. Then he crouches down, so we're at eye level. Up close I can see how bad it really is. The black veins aren't just in his neck anymore—they're creeping into his face, threading through his cheekbones like cracks in porcelain. His lips are pale. His hands won't stop shaking.
He's a dead man.
And I'm his last chance.
"I'm not asking," he says. "The elders don't know about you yet. If they find out you're a match, they'll take you apart piece by piece. You think your uncle's bad? Wait till you meet Elder Lin Yuan. He'll bleed you dry and keep you alive while he does it."
I already know about Lin Yuan. He's my cousin. The one who told Uncle to seal my root in the first place.
"So you're saving me," I say. "How kind."
"I'm using you," Gu Hanchuan corrects. "But I'm the only one who'll let you live after."
I don't believe him.
But I also don't have a choice.
He stands up. Holds out his hand. I stare at it. His fingers are long, scarred across the knuckles. Cultivator hands. Hands that could crush my skull or form a barrier strong enough to shatter mountains. Right now they're just shaking.
"Get up," he says.
I don't take his hand. I push myself up on my own. It takes longer than it should and I'm pretty sure I leave a blood smear on the floor, but I do it.
Gu Hanchuan watches. Doesn't help. Doesn't comment.
When I'm finally standing he turns and walks toward the door.
"Wait," I say.
He stops. Doesn't turn around.
"What about him?" I nod toward Uncle.
Gu Hanchuan glances back. His expression doesn't change. "What about him?"
"You just—you can't leave him here."
"Why not?"
Because if Uncle wakes up he'll kill me. Because if someone finds him like this they'll ask questions. Because I need to know if this is real or if I'm about to walk into something worse.
I don't say any of that.
"He'll talk," I say instead. "He'll tell the elders you were here."
"Let him." Gu Hanchuan's voice is cold. "I'm the Sect Leader. I go where I want."
He pushes the door open. Moonlight spills in, cutting across the floor in a thin white line. Outside I can hear night insects and wind in the trees and nothing else. No voices. No footsteps. He must've cleared the area before he came.
Smart.
Scary.
"Move," he says.
I move.
We walk through the outer sect in silence. My feet are bare and the stone path is freezing but I don't say anything. Gu Hanchuan's ahead of me, not looking back. His shoulders are tight. His gait's uneven. Every few steps he has to stop and breathe through whatever the poison's doing to him.
I could run.
I don't.
Not because I'm scared. Because I need to see where this goes. If he really thinks he can use me and let me live after, he's stupider than I thought. But if he's telling the truth about the elders—if Lin Yuan really is planning to come for me—then maybe I can use Gu Hanchuan right back.
Maybe I can use him to burn the whole sect down.
We pass through the inner gate. The guards don't stop us. They don't even look. One of them has his eyes closed, like he's asleep standing up. The other's staring straight ahead.
Gu Hanchuan did something to them. Spirit technique, probably. I don't know enough about cultivation to tell.
The Sect Leader's hall is at the top of the mountain. It takes us twenty minutes to get there and by the end Gu Hanchuan's leaning on the railing, gasping. His whole body's shaking now. The black veins have spread to his hands.
He's not going to last the night.
Good.
"Inside," he manages.
The hall's huge. Empty. Cold. There's a bed in the center, low to the ground, covered in white silk. Talismans hang from the ceiling, glowing faint red. Barrier seals, I think. To keep the poison contained. Or to keep people out.
Gu Hanchuan stumbles to the bed and sits. He's breathing hard. Sweat's dripping off his chin.
"Come here," he says.
I don't move.
He looks up. His eyes are black now. Completely black. No iris, no white. Just endless dark.
"I said come here."
I take one step forward. Then another. My heart's pounding so hard I can hear it in my ears. When I'm close enough he grabs my wrist. His grip's hot. Burning hot.
"Sit," he orders.
I sit.
He leans forward. His forehead almost touches mine. I can feel his breath on my face—shallow, rapid, scorching.
"This is going to hurt," he says.
"For who?"
He almost smiles. "Both of us."
Then he breathes in.
And everything stops.
His whole body goes rigid. His hand spasms on my wrist, tight enough to bruise. His eyes—still black, still wrong—go wide. He sucks in another breath. Deeper this time. Like he's drowning and I'm air.
I don't understand.
Then I feel it.
My scent.
I didn't even know I had one. Uncle sealed my root so early I never got to the stage where spiritual energy starts manifesting. But now—right now—I can feel something rising up from my core. Something cold and soft and old. It smells like winter. Like snow on cedar. Like something that died a long time ago and hasn't rotted yet.
Gu Hanchuan's shaking.
Not from the poison.
From me.
"What—" His voice cracks. "What is this—"
I don't answer. I don't know how.
He leans closer. His nose brushes my collarbone. He breathes in again and this time he makes a sound—low, desperate, animal.
The black veins in his face start to recede.
Just a little. Just enough.
"Impossible," he whispers. "This isn't—this shouldn't—"
He pulls back. Stares at me. His eyes are still black but there's something else in them now. Something that looks like fear.
"Who was your mother?" he asks.
I freeze.
"What?"
"Your mother." His hand's still on my wrist. He's holding on like I'm the only thing keeping him from falling off a cliff. "Who was she?"
I don't answer.
He shakes me. "Tell me."
"She's dead," I say. "That's all you need to know."
"Her name."
"Why?"
"Because I've smelled this before," Gu Hanchuan says. His voice is raw. Shaking. "Twenty years ago. In this hall. I've smelled this exact scent."
My blood turns to ice.
Twenty years ago I wasn't born yet.
Twenty years ago my mother was still alive.
Gu Hanchuan's staring at me like I'm a ghost. Like I just crawled out of his worst memory and sat down on his bed.
"You sleep in my hall now," he says.
It's not a request.
It's an order.
And I have no idea what he thinks I am.